On Lent and Rearranging

We recently rearranged. 

A few weeks ago, my husband decided it was time for a change.  I'm not a huge fan of change, so it took some convincing.  But we did it.  And after a bit of trial and error (and discovering several dusty things hidden under the couch), we found a look for our living room that felt right.  Felt really right in fact.  Felt like "this is exactly how our living room is supposed to look and I can't believe we haven't had it this way the whole time" right!  The kids even told me for the next few days, "Momma, I really like our new living room," and "My favorite is the red chair in the corner."  And although they say a lot of wise things on their own, I'm pretty sure both these comments they heard from me.  Every now and then I still find myself looking around at the new arrangement and smiling, or commenting to Mike about how much I like it.  

It feels more conducive to conversation - more comfortable being with each other.  It feels more open - more spaciousness with room for the kids to run (and Layla's equipment to take over).  It feels more holy - with the cross and our "family rules" (AKA 1 Corinthians 13) as more of a focal point on our walls now.  It just feels more like what home should be. 

Likely some day in the future we will feel the need to rearrange again.  We usually do.  And though hopefully I will tell the kids how much I like that arrangement as well, for now I'm just enjoying the way that Mike's little nudging, some trial and error, and a bit of hard work has led to my feeling more at home. 

* * * * 

We recently rearranged.  

A few months ago, my husband decided it was time for a change.  I'm not a huge fan of change, so it took some convincing.  But we did it.  And after a bit of baptism by fire (and desperately searching for GOD at work), we found a new job that feels right for Mike.  Feels really right to him in fact.  Feels "this is how a job should feel, happy at the end of the day, I can't believe I waited this long to do this" right!  The kids even brag to friends, family and strangers alike that, "My dad's a social worker," and "he helps other families."  And although they have a vague sense of what that means, considering it's still a bit above their heads I have a feeling they got the idea from him.  Every now and then I still catch a glimpse of him smiling in gratitude, or commenting to me about how much he likes it. 

It feels better for our family - more conducive to intentional presence and relationships.  It feels more freeing - more room to wiggle in our finances and schedule.  It feels more holy - without all the stress and burnout crabbiness as the focal point of so many of our days.  It just feels more like how a family should be.  

Likely some day in the future we may feel the need to rearrange again.  People often do.  And though hopefully the kids will want to brag about whatever new role comes along as well, for now we're just enjoying the way that life's little nudging, some trial and error, and a lot of hard work has led to our feeling more at home.

* * * * 

Today we are rearranging.

It is Ash Wednesday, and in a few hours, our family will celebrate Mass and decide that it's time for a change.  I'm not a huge fan of change, so it always takes some convincing.  But we'll do it.  Because after a long rich history in our faith (and digging into the dusty or dark parts of our being), we have found that there are few things in life that don't need "rearranging" once in a while.  Sometimes really rearranging.  Sometimes "this isn't the way life should feel, and I can't believe I've been doing it this way the whole time" rearranging.  The kids even comment fairly regularly that, "I'm growing up so good and changing, Momma," and "If you need help you can ask Jesus."  And although they've heard those things from me, I'm fairly certain they get them straight from the Holy Spirit.  Every now and then I still catch a glimpse of that Spirit shaking things up, using my kids, my life, my recent re-arrangements to remind me that there is still growing to do, still changes to make and help from Jesus needed that can bring about more smiles and that I just might like better than where I'm at currently in my life and faith journey.  

Perhaps there are changes I need to make that would make my life more conducive to relationships  - those I have and those I have yet to build.  (Forgiveness, presence, phone calls vs. Facebook)  Perhaps there are alterations needed that would make me more open - with more room in my heart for all that lies in need around me.  (More charity, more learning, service vs. being served)  Maybe things I can adjust in order to be more holy - with Christ, prayer, the Church as the focal point of my busy life.  (More Scripture, different prayer, gratitude vs. grumbling)   Maybe what I do, or don't do, for Lent can help me feel more like a disciple should be.  

Likely (no, guaranteed), some day in the future (probably sooner than I'd care to admit), I will have need of rearranging again.  We all do.  That is why we have Lent.  A time to decide a change is in order.  A time to try doing things a little differently.  A time to find what feels right.  Feels really right!  A time to find God hidden under the dust and within the activities of our life.  He was there all along.  It's just time to rearrange, and make Him the focal point.  

So for now, during this brief season of Lent, I am going to try to enjoy the Spirit's little nudging, some trial and error, and a lot of hard work.  And I have a feeling that when all is said and done, I just may feel more at home...with my God!  

Happy Lent to you all - blessings on your journey!